As promised, here is my new story line. It’s a bit raunchier than what you’ve been reading from me so beware.
Like with my Savior series, please don’t take this for more than what it is. I’m not anti-mental health – I just write stories that come to me.
You know you’re addicted to a game when you start fantasizing about the characters; or when you start socializing more with them in your mind than you do with real people.
“What is it you’re trying to say, Val?”
I blink and look over at her, blink a couple of more times and then smile. “I’m sorry Krystal, I hadn’t realized I was thinking out loud.”
Krystal walks over to me. No, that’s not right. She saunters over.
She strolls, walks, saunters – it didn’t matter, she just moves my way and my heart starts pounding faster.
Krystal smiles, she knew she had me. Since day one she knew she had me.
“I thought you’re addicted to me, not your game.”
I laugh. What is it about these NPCs that attract someone? Is it the fact that you guess they’re not going to hurt you – in a sense? They won’t stalk you. They’re safe, they won’t try to come over to your house when you don’t want them to; but then again they won’t come over when you want them to either.
“Well?” She stops and stands right in front of me, in arm’s reach. I want to touch her, but I can’t until she says it’s ok.
“I’m addicted to the game. I’m in love with you.”
She laughs. Oh my gods, the sound drives me crazy. I crack a smile and watch her having a good time at my expense.
“I’m serious.” I tell her.
“It’s not love, my sweet. You’re addicted to sex and mine more than anyone else’s. I get you high.”
Her green eyes are bright as they stare into mine. Oh I am so lost without her.
I shake my head. “I can get myself high, I don’t need your help for that.”
She crosses her arms over her chest, but under her bosom, stands with her legs slightly apart, left hip extended, head cocked and gives me this quasi-irritated look.
And it’s not just any game, because you have characters in all video games, whether they’re online or single player and offline. So, why would you want to try to have a relationship with a computer program? It’s not like they’re going to drop everything and crawl out of the monitor to you.
“I love you.” I tell her.
“I know you do.”
“I want you.” My voice is hoarse as I declare that.
She grins. Everything about her is so perfect. I can get lost in her green eyes – the closest to any forest I’ll ever be. Her auburn hair cascades down to her shoulders and falls over her arms. It so soft, like her skin, and smells like … like …
Maybe an overactive imagination is how many writers got their starts? But you tend to wonder; when you see the kissing scene does it make you tremble? When you’re walking around and it just happens that the character you have a crush on winds up right behind or next to your avatar, do you start wishing they would put their hand in yours or wrap their arms around you?
I’m sitting on a couch, so she straddles my legs and sits on them. Then she wraps her arms around my neck and looks at me. Her perfume is an aphrodisiac. I would do anything for her, and I think I have. That’s why I’m here. But she’s here with me too, and it makes this so much better. I know she’ll never leave me. But I know she’ll never love me, not the way I want her to.
She needs me, she’s told me that much. Right now it’s pretty much enough because I need her too.
They say crazy people, schizophrenics, hear voices in their heads. What is the difference between imagining that an NPC is professing their love for you and what they go through?
Is it bad? Is it bad to wish that one day when you open a door you open a portal into their world, which doesn’t actually exist?
“How badly do you want me?” She’s leaned closer to me and whispers in my ear. I can feel her breast against me, her lips brush my ear, her hands on my back.
I close my eyes, take a deep breath and fight the urge to move. She can feel me trembling in her arms. I’d bite my lip for a distraction, but she’s already beaten me to that.
“Then tell that bitch to go away so I can take you … here … now!”
I take a gasping breath in and open my eyes. The ‘bitch’ Krystal just mentioned is sitting on a chair over by the door watching me. She’s actually sitting behind her desk, which is by the door, her laptop open and she’s typing on it. I’m not sure what she’s typing because I can’t remember anything either of us has said, if we’ve said anything at all.
She doesn’t seem to be paying attention to me at all now; she’s watching her fingers fly over that keyboard. I’m starting to wonder if I’m actual something from someone’s imagination.
“Did she saying anything to you this time?”
“Wh-what?” I freeze. Yeah I wasn’t actually expecting that.
“Normally you tell me she starts in on you when you’ve been here longer than either of you want. But you were pretty quiet this time.”
“I don’t …” What the fuck is she talking about.
“Did you fight a dragon? Rescue a princess? Have sex?”
“I think I’d better go.”
The ‘bitch’ looks at her watch. “Your time’s not up. Sean won’t be here for another seven minutes.”
“Well, then you can go and I’ll stay here and wait for Sean.” I’ve never had an accent but I’ve never been able to properly pronounce that name. It always comes out at ‘shone’.
“You know the door’s locked from the outside.”
“Did I hit too close to home this time? Does she want me to leave or do you?”
“Look, I’m tired, I’m bored, and I think it’s about dinner time.”
“Well, you have made some progress.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You didn’t masturbate this time.”
Wow! That just came out of left field. I’m kind of speechless. “I think we’re done.”